good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
