You're so nebulous sometimes
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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