I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
