i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
