If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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