Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
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It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
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Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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