i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
