Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today