so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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