Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize