yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Randomize
