Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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