Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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