you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
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