I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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