just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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