Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
When are your genitals available?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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