he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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