I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize