You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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