similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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