Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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