Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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