this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
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