i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
