I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
