Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize