i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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