i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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