We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
