I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
