susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
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