The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
