I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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