Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
