8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
