OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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