Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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