just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
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