6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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