I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
They took my balls.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize