so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
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you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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