theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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