Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize