no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I can't turn off my feet"
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Randomize