Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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