Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
