if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
