Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
