Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize